mt baldy

hey guess what?! i climbed my first california mountain yesterday! and what an adventure it was. i set out with mark, brandon, and david...and i was expecting a great time, an awesome view, a good workout...but what i got was all that plus so much more :) yes, it was a great time! it surely was an incredible view of the mountains and the kind of beauty that overwhelms me. and yeah, it was a workout...my sore muscles today are reminding me of that. but i also got to experience the kind of wind that could knock someone off a mountain! hahaa...thank goodness it didn't! but wow, it was so stinkin' powerful and strong and it made the hike unforgettable. i didn't realize the wind was so strong until we were just a ways from the top. we passed a couple groups who said that they didn't make it all the way up. my first thoughts were, "oh, but we'll definitely make it!"....but eventually i got to thinking, "ok, maybe i can't do this!" it was out of control!! i've never been through anything like that before. seriously. there were times when i had to just crouch down on the ground, or lay flat, because i was no match for the wind. we ran from rock pile to rock pile trying to make it all the way up. when we finally made it up to 10064 feet, it was quite an accomplishment! it just so happens to be the tallest mountain that i've climbed :) so...the way down was an accomplishment just the same. the wind was still intense in spots....especially at the "passageway of death", which is what i like to call it. i was in the back of the line when we approached this particular spot, so when i looked up and saw it for the first time, i thought-oh my goodness, i don't know if we should be doing this! had it not been windy, it would've been a piece of pie...but with the wind barreling through this narrow trail with a rock slide on either side, i'm not gonna lie, i was a little scared. but we walked on :) and i'm glad we did...because it was fun, but absolutely crazy. at one point, the guy behind me was doing the crab walk just so he could stay close to the ground. that was probably the same point that i was huddled in a ball. i really thought that i was gonna go off the side! it was great. so, we made it through the death trap...and continued on. the wind was still howling, but it wasn't so bad. maybe we were just used to it. the trail was beautiful and the trees and mountains and clouds grabbed my attention. but pretty soon, the word was out that we had taken a different trail down than we thought we had. but it was all good...i had signed up for an adventure :) eventually it got to the point where we had to pull the headlamps out because darkness had set in, which made it even more fun. the end of the trail finally came in sight...but we were quite a bit off from where the car was at. so....guess what? i went with mark, and i got to hitchhike for the first time in my life :) i've always thought that would be fun, and it was definitely a good first-time experience. the woman that was gracious enough to give us a ride was super nice. and i was so thankful for her because, well, the car was way further than i thought! it would've been a rather long walk. it was a great day...and here's so pictures to show it. although...keep in mind that these photos don't capture the wind...the blasting frigid air...the beauty in its entirety...or the passageway of death (man, i wish i could've had a video of that to show ya'll, but i must say i was more concerned for my life:)

the hunt is on

so my search for a job continues. questions are still swarming about my head and heart as to what is best, what i should do, and just wanting to make a wise decision. i'm eager to see just exactly what that is going to be and where this journey takes me. i had two interviews this week...and one more tomorrow. please pray for wisdom for me. the people i'm staying with are still so welcoming and comfortable and glad to have me. although yesterday i set off their house alarm. whoops. it was rather funny, once i was able to get the silly thing turned off.

much love....b r o o k e

no longer a stranger

oh...one more thing. i arrived in lake forest on friday night to stay at my temporary home for the next three weeks. i wasn't nervous, but at the same time i was thinking...what in the world am i doing? i've spent an hour with these people. but it was clear to me that it was from the Lord, so i just went with it. and whoa...it's been a really good thing. they are so generous. so open. so comfortable. and moments when i start to think that maybe i should feel awkward being there...they remind me that i'm welcome, to just make myself at home, and that they're glad to have me there. and they have blessed my heart.

more later...

a page is turned...

i know it sounds so clique that a chapter of my life has just ended, but it's so true. and that's exactly how it feels. it was a chapter that was sometimes a comedy, sometimes a drama, sometimes a tear-jerker, and sometimes a choose-your-own-adventure. my experience with msa isn't something i would want to take back...yet i realize and accept that it's time to move on. as i pause to look back and try to process what i learned and where God was moving through it all, my heart is filled with lots of great things.
here's some of the nuggets of goodness that i'm leaving msa with...
friendships that i wouldn't have otherwise had. experience in the amazing ocean and knowledge of some of the things that fill it. a reminder of how simple life can actually be lived. times of learning to trust the Lord and cling to him. experience in teaching and leading. an appreciation for truely good drinking water (catalina water was less than desirable.) a great adventure and great memories that go along with it. a realization that the needed amount of showers and clothes washings isn't as much or as frequent as one would think (don't get me wrong, i haven't turned into some gross girl...but camp has a way of making me comfortable with a little dirt.) seeing things i've never seen, doing things i've never done, being places i've never been, and praising God for his stunning creation. and friends that will probably forever call me creek.
and as this page is turned...i'm looking ahead to a blank page. as that one song says, "...the rest is still unwritten..." as i drove away on friday with msa behind me, i was overcome with this sense of freedom. which felt really good seeing that this past week was consumed with questions and uneasiness. i'm sure those feelings will resurface as i continue seeking out where my road is headed, but that freedom was just so needed. so comforting. the sun was shining, my windows were down, and u2-joshua tree was playing. it was a moment that made me smile. i drove up to this amazing little chapel that overlooks the pacific...catalina was fully in view, and the sun sparkled on the water so much that it nearly hurt my eyes. for that moment, things just seemed right.

leaving the island...

this is my last night on the island. the last night of hearing the ocean as i drift off to sleep. i took my last snorkel today. last group of kids. last campfire here. lots of lasts. and my heart is a bit sad. sad to say somemore goodbyes. sad because it's the end of this time of my life. and because the days ahead of me are big questions that are staring me in the face.

good stuff

as i'm sure most of you know, my job is up really soon. really soon meaning this friday! yikes...i can't believe that my time with msa has come to a close. there's a part of me that's very ready to move on, and another part of me that is going to miss this place greatly. but anyways, so i've been trying to figure out what i'm going to do with my life for awhile now. i've been applying to places...scoping out apartments looking for somewhere to call home. i've had hopeful moments here and there, but nothing certain. so...this past week i spent a couple days on the mainland just trying to sort through some of this. and i'm not gonna lie...saturday was a roller coaster ride kind of a day. it was super cruddy because the reality of my situation consumed me. i realized i'm sort of disappointed with life sometimes. and i just wished i could hit the pause button on this journey so i could collect myself and try to piece somethings together. my heart and mind were filled with thoughts and questions of what in the world am i doing here in california, where do i go from here, am i ever going to find a job that satisfies, should i go home, am i making the right decisions, i'm in need of some roots and some relationships, why does God seem so uninvolved in this, i feel so alone, what kind of job am i even looking for, i just want to make my life count....those were just some of the things i was pondering. and i was just overwhelmed.
but it was saturday night. and i was on the mainland. which meant that i was able to go to church! which made me smile. i slipped in the doors, probably not noticed by many. i sat amidst the crowd. tears just filled my eyes...because it was a safe place, because it caused me to dwell on the goodness of the Lord, and my heart could just unload a bit. the service was great. the music was great. and i didn't want to leave. because it just meant that it was time to go back to the sailboat that i was staying on. so...i lingered for awhile. people filed out of the room. but i just remained seated. my head was down, so i didn't notice that someone came to sit by my side. i felt a hand on my shoulder. i turned to the side to see a man...probably somewhere around my dad's age. we sat in silence for a moment or two because just the fact that he cared enough to come up to me, a complete stranger, made the tears come again. i briefly explained my situation. he was quick to suggest that i come and meet his wife and their friends. as he introduced me, one of the first things he said was that i needed a job and a home. i'm not gonna lie, it sort of made me feel uncomfortable. which made me remember that sometimes i have a hard time accepting things/help from people. it humbles me because i realize that i can't do it on my own. so there i was....my needs were right out in front for these people i just met to see. but they didn't seem to mind. they were really great and seemed to care a lot. pretty soon, they asked if i'd like to join them for something to eat. i had an apartment to go and check out...but i told them i would meet them there. so i did. as we were sitting around the table, rick and kathy asked a bunch of questions. they were just trying to piece together my story. where i'm from, how i got there, what i'm looking for, etc. they also asked about the apt i went to see. it was a decent place and she offered it to me...but it wasn't available until december 1. (which i knew when i had called earlier that day to inquire about it...but for some reason i just decided to call anyways, even though it made no sense because i need a place this friday!) rick smiled when he heard that...because he then told me that i was more than welcome to stay at their house for the three weeks inbetween. i cannot tell ya'll how amazing this was. these people i'd never even met...they prayed for me in the parking lot...they offered me a room to stay in...and they just seemed so glad to do it. i was so encouraged. and i was reminded that the Lord wasn't far off, but he was right there putting all this together. wow...God is so faithful. so why do i ever worry? my dad reminded me that God is rarely early, but he's never late. seriously. it's so true. that's so like God to wait until days before i go homeless to show me the next step to take...all to just build my trust in who he is, to remind me of his faithfulness, and to continue to build a history with him. i love it. but man, it's stretching. and it hurts sometimes. i felt like i was at the end of my rope...but it's like God gave me another mile to work with. wherever ya'll are at...if God seems uninvolved, if questions need answers, if you've had enough...man, i know how that feels. i totally do. but from someone who has been given an answer to just one of the question marks...i encourage you to just hang on. hang on. even when you think you can't anymore. because no matter what it feels like in the midst of your circumstance, the fact doesn't change that the Lord is faithful.

more to come...

a glimpse of camp life

seeing that i absolutely love photographs, i decided to do a bit of a photo documentary of a week at camp. it turned into two and a half weeks and more pictures than i know what to do with, but it was lots of fun! so here's just a peek into it...